Previewing, Sort of, the 2020 Republican Convention
Nobody knows what will really happen at the GOP convention this week, primarily because they are still figuring it out.
Seriously. Donald Trump saw parts of last week’s Democratic convention and said “I can do better.” Predictably, chaos has ensued. Every last detail must go through the Oval Office, and organizers can only hope the President’s attention span is up to the task.
Every day will build to a crescendo, with loads of live feeds featuring an anxious public awaiting the latest truths from the Dear Leader.
From the New York Times:
Party officials say their convention — during which Mr. Trump is expected to speak every night in the 10 p.m. hour — will ultimately surpass the Democrats’ telethon-like show, which the president and his allies have repeatedly called “dark,” depressing and thin on policy proposals. “We’re going to have more of it live than what they did,” Mr. Trump told Fox News on Thursday. “I think it’s pretty boring when you do tapes.”
Exactly what that looks like remains an open question.
As Monday’s kickoff looms, Republican officials were still deciding what segments to air live and what would be taped in advance. Typically, convention broadcasts require weeks of highly technical preparation. By the weekend, producers at the major TV networks had only a foggy idea of what to expect, although Republicans provided a more detailed rundown on Saturday evening. Still, broadcasters will head into the week with some unknowns.
https://twitter.com/BillKristol/status/1297382976221859841?s=20
Rather than wait for what will inevitably be a tsunami of fabrications, insinuations, and conspiracy chatter, I’ve decided to get out front with my own version of things that *could* happen.
It’s my new twist on the Truth Sandwich, the way we’re supposed to speak of Trumpian lies so as not to spread their toxins throughout the interwebs.
For this of you unfamiliar with this process it goes:
Tell the truth - Red is a color
Point out the lie - Trump says Red is a food group
Explain why it’s a lie - Show paint chip next to USDA Food Chart
So my version, which is much more fun, goes as follows:
Tell my lie first - The White House cabinet is made up of flying monkeys
Then their lie - Video of Trump speaking about all the best people
Then fact check - Picture of Peter Navarro
Got it? Good.
I have no intention of following that format. It’s too hard and Republicans just aren’t worth the effort.
https://twitter.com/decaro_nick/status/1297340691895300096?s=20
Monday- The unofficial theme for the GOP convention this year is “Riots are the new caravans,” featuring two hours of Blackxperts Diamond & Silk narrating footage of civil disorders followed by tributes to the heroes pardoned by the President in recent years.
This was a compromise, since putting former administration officials on the agenda might violate their probation terms.
The evening’s keynote speaker will be Donald Trump, Jr, who will begin with a tribute to his brother Eric, who isn’t appearing live due to time constraints. I’ve managed to obtain the video.
https://twitter.com/J_Mei21/status/1297256283146539008?s=20
There will be additional speakers, but if I tell you when they’ll be speaking, Dear Leader will have me silenced.
https://twitter.com/stonecold2050/status/1297191556802162688?s=20
Tuesday - First Lady Melania Trump will speak from the renovated Rose Garden, or as I like to call it, her final raised finger to America. Don’t make fun of her effort or GOP trolls will accuse you of being insensitive.
Earlier in the evening, Steve Mnuchin will issue a heartfelt plea for donations to cover the President’s legal costs.
https://ktla.com/news/politics/judge-orders-trump-to-reimburse-stormy-daniels-for-legal-fees/
Wednesday - Second lady Karen Pence will speak on mental health challenges without mentioning Donald Trump’s name once.
Senator Martha McSally, will urge followers to skip a meal next week and donate the money saved by fasting to the Trump campaign. This ploy has proved to be wildly popular on social media among her Arizona constituents.
Vice President Mike Pence will speak from Fort McHenry in Baltimore, provided the rioting calms down enough to get his motorcade through to the location.
https://twitter.com/dougporter506/status/1297301972706398208?s=20
Thursday - The big day will be the biggest you’ve ever seen
First daughter Ivanka Trump will announce her really big plans for the second inauguration.
“We will have the biggest crowds, the grandest parade, and many people are saying the parties will be the best ever.”
By the way:
A government lawsuit filed in January alleges that Ivanka Trump illegally over-billed the non-profit Inauguration Committee to bilk expenses and benefit the Trump family to the tune of $1 million..
President Donald Trump, Qmander of the United States of Amnesia will review his first term list of grievances, promise a miracle cure for COVID-19, and accuse his enemies of doing everything he does.
Locally, County GOP Leader Tony Krvaric will lead a poorly attended maskless rally featuring County Supervisors Kristen Gaspar and Jim Desmond to be broadcast live on KUSI.
https://twitter.com/jaketapper/status/1296993970019618817?s=20
And that's all she wrote, folks....
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